Some Thoughts on the Tension in America

I am white.

I am male.

There, I said it. But I won’t let these facts override one other.

I am a person.

It hurts me to write this but at this point in time I feel I need to.

I have done racist things in my life. I have locked my car doors when driving through predominately black neighborhoods in Milwaukee. I have crossed the street when I have seen a small group of black men standing on the sidewalk among others things. Why? I wasn’t under any threat. I certainly wasn’t being eyed with any suspicion. What I did do is allow myself to perform these baseless actions which were taught to me by a society that is…

…predominately white; predominately male.

What I did, I did out of ignorance and thoughtlessness.

I apologize.

But these are not irredeemable. I can be taught out of my ignorance. I can come to the realization that there is white male privilege, as a first step. I can learn that while my privilege exists I can see it for what it is. A corruption in our socio-economic, justice and political systems that are truly not equally accessible by all people in America. I can work to change these from within, as far as I can with the abilities I have.

I can have no idea what is like to be a black man in America. That would be arrogance of the highest degree and I won’t be a part of that. But I choose to see that inequality and injustice exist. I choose to work against it. But one inescapable fact remains.

American lives are being lost and being treated of less than value of others; fewer opportunities given. Is this a means of control? I’m not in a place where I can make that call.

Michael Brown is a symbol for our country, so is Darren Wilson but more so the events that occurred between the two. That is the symbol of where we are as a society.

President Obama, Eric Holder and others in positions of power can at best guide the country. But change, real change, for the county can only come from individuals.

I choose to change.


NaNoWriMo the Several-eth

It was slow going for a few days on my NaNoWriMo project North of the Fox.

I’m so glad I took a week of vacation to work on the damned thing.

Wow, maybe I bit off a little too much by wanting to write a dystopian novel, but when things are going right they seem to go really right.

I pumped out over 3000 words today and I am looking forward to giving the brain a rest for the evening.

I’m wondering if many other people are having the same trouble of keeping plot elements, character arcs, main plot and sub plot straight. Even with notes it’s… Oh Brother!

And a shout out to Aetherhouse: Here’s hoping your con went off without a hitch and that your novel starts behaving itself. Oy! How busy can one person try to be?

So now I think it might be time for dinner and a beer (good beer, not crappy beer) or two and to watch something comical on tv.

NaNo Update the Fifth


Yes as it has worked out today, I have worked through a potentially  catastrophic spot where I seemed at first to have written myself into a corner. But as it turns out…


I took a North of the Fox in a slightly new direction that has added depth to the novel and developed the protagonist now  more fully. Through it all I wrote nearly three thousand words. I’m still managing to keep everything on plan.

I love it when things work out for the best. Bwa Ha Ha Ha

Tomorrow if all goes well I should be up at a decent time, say about 8:00 and soon after banging on these drums all day um I mean this keyboard for a few hours.

One huge help for me personally has been Kristen Lamb‘s blog. Thanks Kristen for the inspirational advice!

And a huge thanks to NaNoWriMo and the writing pep talks the organization had been providing.

I hope all is going well with Aether House  (and her novel Figments!),  my official writing buddy and another source of inspiration.

My Goal for tomorrow is to have 10 to 11 thousand words done in total. We will have to see how far I get but my fingers are crossed.



NaNo Update the Fourth

What a difference a day makes.

I am feeling much better and much more rested today!

After managing to scratch out another couple pages of notes for my novel today at work, I took the time and used the energy gained form a great night’s sleep to start the second chapter of my novel and get about 1200 words into it.

That said, I’m still planning to write about 800-900 words a day that I have to work and at least 3000 words on days that I have off.

That includes the week of vacation I scheduled the week before Thanksgiving Week.  Woo hoo! Nine days of the joy and challenge of writing. And yes, if you are wondering, that is the sole reason I took off that week.

Best of luck to all NaNoWriMo writers!


NaNo Update the Third

So I had my flu shot today…


Now I’m feeling nearly completely drained. Don’t think I’ll get much if anything written today. But all is not lost… I’m still ahead on my personal word count and writing plan for the month.

anime tired

Also I had the chance to scribble out three pages of notes during my day at work. I think I’ve found a way to start the second chapter of North of the Fox. So I’m guessing that’s a good thing, right?

Short post, I know but right now I’m looking forward to a good night’s sleep and waking up at a hundred percent.

Hoping all is going well for my fellow NaNoWriMo participants.